The President of the United States’s sons recently visited Vancouver for 24-hours, enjoying a whirlwind tour of this great city and they graciously invited the Burrard Street Journal to tag along.
Here’s just a sample of the highlights Donald Jr. and Eric Trump got up to on their big day off in Vancity:
- Had breakfast in the Elbow Room Cafe on Davie St. Ordered sit-down meal initially.
Changed it to takeaway after 5 minutes.
- Tweeted a picture of the Seawall to their father mocking its length but complementing its ability to keep Mexicans away.
- Explained to tour guide how “amazing” Stanley Park would be as a golf resort and spa.
- Commented that East Hastings had “major potential” to be bulldozed down and replaced with semi-luxury hotels.
- Mentioned that they thought the Steam Clock was “honestly, pretty shit”.
- Lead a large parade down Burrard Street singing Twist n’ Shout as thousands of Vancouverites danced along.
- Avoided any streets where some unrelated protests were taking place.
- Smoked a few joints on Wreck Beach and caught a late evening yoga session at YYoga.
- Posed for obligatory “East Van” Sign selfie. Immediately left and drove to Yaletown.
- Ended the night by raiding Costco for toilet rolls and TP-ing the Shangri-La. Also picked up years supply of hair gel.
And all this for the small cost of just $2.8 million to the Canadian and American taxpayers apiece. Those Groupons sure worked out.