EXCLUSIVE: How Donald Trump’s Sons Spent 24 Hours In Vancouver

How Donald Trump's Sons Spent 24 Hours In Vancouver
How Donald Trump's Sons Spent 24 Hours In Vancouver...

The President of the United States’s sons recently visited Vancouver for 24-hours, enjoying a whirlwind tour of this great city and they graciously invited the Burrard Street Journal to tag along.

Here’s just a sample of the highlights Donald Jr. and Eric Trump got up to on their big day off in Vancity:

  • Had breakfast in the Elbow Room Cafe on Davie St. Ordered sit-down meal initially.
    Changed it to takeaway after 5 minutes.
  • Tweeted a picture of the Seawall to their father mocking its length but complementing its ability to keep Mexicans away.
  • Explained to tour guide how “amazing” Stanley Park would be as a golf resort and spa.
  • Commented that East Hastings had “major potential” to be bulldozed down and replaced with semi-luxury hotels.
  • Mentioned that they thought the Steam Clock was “honestly, pretty shit”.
  • Lead a large parade down Burrard Street singing Twist n’ Shout as thousands of Vancouverites danced along.
  • Avoided any streets where some unrelated protests were taking place.
  • Smoked a few joints on Wreck Beach and caught a late evening yoga session at YYoga.
  • Posed for obligatory “East Van” Sign selfie. Immediately left and drove to Yaletown.
  • Ended the night by raiding Costco for toilet rolls and TP-ing the Shangri-La. Also picked up years supply of hair gel.

And all this for the small cost of just $2.8 million to the Canadian and American taxpayers apiece. Those Groupons sure worked out.

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