Kevin O’Leary Debuts New Red Hair, Continues to Deny Conservative Leadership Talks

Kevin O’Leary Debuts New Red Hair, Continues to Deny Conservative Leadership Talks
Kevin O’Leary Debuts New Red Hair, Continues to Deny Conservative Leadership Talks

THE FORMER Dragon’s Den star, Kevin O’Leary, has been spotted in Ottawa sporting a new red headpiece, sending Conservative tails wagging at a potential bid for the leadership.

Early Monday morning, CTV and CBC reported O’Leary was spotted at YOW airport in Ottawa, fuelling speculation of an imminent announcement from the Conservative party. Speaking to the assembled media outside the airport, O’Leary brushed off the recent political links and stated he was simply in the capital for “an important meeting completely unrelated to the Conservative Party”.

Similarly, one source close to the leadership dismissed the O’Leary links by saying, “Well we’re not exactly going to elect a bald Prime Minister. We’re not completely delusional.”

At approximately 9:45am, O’Leary was spotted by reporters entering a hairdressers at 130 Albert street. Shortly after 2:00pm, he re-emerged sporting the new hair style and a noticeably more confident demeanour. Descending the hair salon in an unusually slow moving escalator as Summer of ’69 blasted out, O’Leary waved to the assembled masses before striding up to a conveniently-placed podium.

After basking in the crowd’s acclaim for a moment, O’Leary spoke, again claiming that he was not considering running: “You know I came to Ottawa for a simple haircut, but seeing these poor people here has made me angry. These people deserve a better leader. I think it’s time to make Canada rich again, even Alberta if possible.”

With so much talk on how Canada could be better governed, one journalist presumptuously asked if O’Leary himself might run for the leadership. O’Leary’s response was untypically blunt: “Why the hell would you make that leap?” he said exasperatedly. “Just because I’m standing on this this podium? Draped by the Canadian flag and hundreds of $50 bills? With a giant sign behind me that reads ‘make Canada rich again’ and ‘OLEARY2019’?” Before muttering, “Typical media making sh*t up…”

While O’Leary was in no mood to discuss his bid for the Conservative party, he did discuss whether or not any potential Prime Minister should have to speak fluent french. “No I don’t think so,” he said. “I think the simplest solution is to give Quebec that independence they’ve always wanted so badly. If it were me, I’d build a wall around Quebec, and make them pay for it.”

Follow FM NEWS on Facebook for more…

Comments