WASHINGTON, DC—The American President Donald Trump has tonight been advised to ingest as much bleach as is humanly possible following his positive diagnosis for Covid-19.
The advice came from all leading health officials, doctors, nurses, and people with half a brain from across the United States, who collectively urged the President to follow through on his own advice and inject bleach directly into his veins.
Trump received his positive diagnosis alongside wife Melania, his advisor Hope Hicks, as well as several other White House administrative staff.
Now more than 150 million Americans have advised the President to follow his own earlier guidelines and drink as much bleach as he can in an effort to kill off the Coronavirus.
“Well it’s a proven method by the President’s own admission, so what better way to put his unique theory to the test than with the healthiest President in history,” America argued.
Leading nations from across the world have also pledged to donate as much bleach as is necessary to aid in the President’s recovery.