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NEWS
Trump Advised To Drink As Much Bleach As Possible
WASHINGTON, DC—The American President Donald Trump has tonight been advised to ingest as much bleach as is humanly possible following his positive diagnosis for...
CANADIAN NEWS
Trump Advised To Drink As Much Bleach As Possible
WASHINGTON, DC—The American President Donald Trump has tonight been advised to ingest as much bleach as is humanly possible following his positive diagnosis for...
Alex Jones ‘Seriously Considering’ Presidential Run Given Current Field
MOJAVE DESERT, NA—Alex Jones, the infamous founder of the alt-right entertainment site, Infowars, is reportedly "seriously considering" a presidential run in November...
Satire Writer Struggling To Think Of Dumber Celebrity To Run For President Than Kanye,...
VANCOUVER, BC—A local satire writer who until today had always prided himself on being able to lampoon the already ridiculous reality of...
Taiwan Officially Lists British Columbia As Province Of China
THE government of Taiwan's official website has quietly changed the its designation of British Columbia to a "province of China".
FOOTBALL NEWS
Man Utd Make Last-Minute Bid To Re-Sign Marouane Fellaini
MANCHESTER, UK—With just hours remaining of the 2020 summer transfer window, Manchester United have launched a last minute bid to re-sign Marouane...
Rooney Defends Drink Driving Charge: ‘You Try Being In Liverpool Sober’
LIVERPOOL, UK—Wayne Rooney has issued a staunch defence of his latest drink-driving charge, calling on his critics to "try being in Liverpool sober" if...
Raheem Sterling demands Liverpool move Anfield to London
Anfield has been rocked today after the announcement that Raheem Sterling demands Liverpool move to London.
Sterling shocked the club by cutting off talks over...
Man Utd Make Last-Minute Bid To Re-Sign Marouane Fellaini
MANCHESTER, UK—With just hours remaining of the 2020 summer transfer window, Manchester United have launched a last minute bid to re-sign Marouane...
Phil Jones Shocked To Discover Football Has Returned, Claims Nobody Informed Him
MANCHESTER, UK —On July 24th England and Manchester United defender Phil Jones (28) admitted his life got turned upside down after being...
Juventus Sign Cartoon Aardvark For £72.5 Million
TURIN, ITALY—Serie A leaders Juventus have completed the signing of Arthur, the cartoon aardvark from the popular animated tv series Arthur for...
Respect. Lionel Messi Just Confirmed That All Barcelona Players Will Start Paying Taxes Due...
BARCELONA, SPAIN—As the Coronavirus continues to devastate the world, particularly Italy and Spain, players for FC Barcelona today announced that they will...
![BREAKING: British Columbia Renamed Irish Columbia [Live Updates]](https://i1.wp.com/www.burrardstreetjournal.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/BREAKING_-British-Columbia-Renamed-Irish-Columbia-Live-Updates.jpg?resize=324%2C160&ssl=1 "LIVE: British Columbia Renamed Irish Columbia [As it happened]")
