WASHINGTON, DC—As a mark of respect for his first annual St. Patrick’s Day meeting with the leader of Ireland, Donald Trump has ditched his signature orange skin in favour of green.
Greeting the Irish Prime Minister or Taoiseach, Enda Kenny, on the front steps of the White House, Trump appeared covered from head-to-toe in a bright green tint.
“I thought you’d be greener,” Trump declared, as the Irish PM approached. “Normally I never do this, so honestly this is such an amazing honour for you,” he added, pointing to his face. “Welcome to America Enda.”
“Er, thank you Mr. Trump,” the Taoiseach responded. “On behalf of all the people of Ireland let me tell you what a pleasure—”
“Oh please, my employees call me Mr. Trump,” the Donald interrupted, shaking his head. “Please Enda, call me President Trump.”
“Is greenface PC in your country?” the President interrupted, “because I nearly made a huuge mistake during black history month.” Trump added that he was going to wear a full leprechaun costume but said that too it was vetoed by a higher power.
Later, while declaring the entire move a “major, major success”, he remarked that “Edna” had noticed Trump’s resemblance to the Incredible Hulk given his ginormous green hands, noting that while Mr. Kenny didn’t explicitly say it, “you could just tell he was thinking it”.